Tuesday, 24 December 2013

Top ten inappropriate quotes from public figures.


Just for fun.


In ascending order, these are popular ‘worst’ quotes
made by our public figures.

10) “I am the best rapper in Nigeria. If you have an
opposing opinion, now is the best time to keep it to
yourself” Rapper Yung6ix having his imagined Kendrick
Lamar moment. Dear Yung6ix; make good music, put
out an album, put your name out there. Maybe then
we’ll take you seriously.

See more after the cut...



9) “Any academic staff who fails to resume on or
before December 4, 2013 automatically ceases to be a
staff of the institution and vice chancellors are also
directed to advertise vacancies in their institutions.”
Nyesom Wike, supervising minster for the education
ministry wading full throttle into the federal government-
ASUU impasse like the uncouth fellow that he is and
trying (unsuccessfully, thank God) to scuttle the work of
parties genuinely committed to ending the months long
strike. His ill advised press conference in which he
stayed screaming at the microphone and yelled threats
became an instant visual manual for government
officials on how not to act in public. We shudder to
recall.

8) “I was not a tribalist when I had a long-standing and
intimate relationship with Miss Bianca Onoh, an Igbo
lady…” What shall we do with Femi Fani Kayode? For
most of the year, the former aviation minister and
presidential spokesman was a national embarrassment,
spewing forth conspiracy theories on any subject
catching his fancy. While he had so many disastrous
statements, he got more than he bargained for when in
defending himself against tribalism attacks, bizarrely
claimed to have had a sizzling relationship with Bianca
Ojukwu, widow of the late Biafran warlord. He was
forced to recant when she threatened to sue him for
every penny.

7) “We have stolen billions of dollars, what did you do?
We steal because you never stoned us for it.” Governor
Rotimi Amechi of Rivers state takes his side job as
ruffler of feathers very seriously. He dishes out one
provocative statement after the other without giving a
damn and exists to taunt the unfortunate suckers who
have not gained access to the national loot. At a tribute
event for Nelson Mandela some weeks back he dropped
his latest verbal missile and it was both an indictment
on himself as it was on his docile followers. No sir, in
bad taste.

6) “Come, sit on my laps and I will show you a level of
grace you do not understand.” According to Ese Walters,
repentant adultress and misguided victim, senior Pastor
Biodun Fatoyinbo of the Commonwealth Of Zion
Assembly must have been using these cringe worthy
lines to score with wide-eyed members of his female
congregation. The most surprising part of this line is
that it actually works. His sweet roll came to an end
when she published a tell all blog post revealing the
pastor’s many sexcapades. Pastor Fatoyinbo is yet to
deny Walters’ claims. And is yet to give that robust
response.

5) “As the president, I don’t know him (Abu Shekau)
and don’t know if he is dead or alive; you journalists
will know more than us. You are the ones who talk to
Boko Haram” In a presidential media chat, Goodluck
Ebele Jonathan uttered the words never to be spoken by
a country’s chief security officer. In denying the
whereabouts (and maybe existence) of Abu Shekau,
Boko Haram’s point man, he took the war on terror 10
steps back. Worse still was the lackadaisical manner in
which he delivered his cluelessness.

4) “Yes, Patience Jonathan is my Jesus Christ!” Now
this would be funny if it wasn’t so sad. And true. Hon.
Evans Bipi of the Rivers state house of assembly who
proved he was anything but honourable, was speaking
from the bottom of his heart when he declared dame
Patience Jonathan (aka mama Peace) his deity as she
was responsible for his political career so far.

3) “I cannot categorically tell you one now… the one we
are going to make use of is going to be made known
by my oga at the top…” Mr Obafaiye Shem, former
Lagos state commandant of the National Security and
Civil Defence Corps was asked a simple straight forward
question by the hosts of Channels tv’s daily breakfast
show. “What is the website of the NSCDC?” It became
his undoing as he went on a rambling routine that did
not produce the answer to the question but succeeded
in shedding light on the pathetic state of affairs of our
public institutions and officers. Shame on you Shem.

2) “We do not pray for accidents but it is inevitable…
we do everything to ensure that we do not have
accidents, but it is an act of God.” Stella Oduah,
Aviation minister addressing journalists 3 days after 16
people lost their lives in the Associated airlines crash
that was ferrying the remains of Olusegun Agagu, a
former aviation minister. Of course, as it turned out, God
had nothing to do with this particular crash as the
Accident Investigation Bureau revealed that a
malfunctioning engine and a wrong call by the pilot was
most likely the cause.

1) “You are a widow… go and die” Oh dear! Edo state
governor, Comrade Adams Oshiomhole became this
year’s face of insensitivity when he was recorded on
video, yelling at a poor widow displaying her wares
illegally by the roadside to go and die. He later had tea
with his victim and rewarded her generously but still,
that image lingers.


Use the Comment box to send in more quotes.


Compiled by Wilfred Okiche on ynaiija

















No comments:

Post a Comment